Ponder

Man I am down and out again today. Peach Days has already done me in - literally. Still got up. My mind is getting stronger all the time. It wants me to get up as well. My body screams at how tired it is but my mind and it's needs and health is louder and stronger so I get up with the knowledge that to survive the day I need this morning ritual or it can't do it. My body will follow the mind so let's keep it up!

Today in study the words were right at the first - thank goodness - since I start strong and wane at the end. Ponder - not only in our minds but in our hearts. This might have stuck out because I really have enjoyed my morning meditations. I like the mind so much. I love the 5 minutes a day I give it time to calm and refocus. The heart is newer to me. I don't know that I spend a lot of time pondering in my heart. I value my mind and it's reasoning so much that I think I forget the value of my heart. I do believe a calm mind creates a place and a space for the heart to speak so I feel like I'm on the right track with meditation. Now to just take the time to allow my heart to think, speak, PONDER.

*Grateful that my mind is truly become stronger than my body. It is getting better and easier. It's never easy, but it is easier.

*I had lots of people watching out for me yesterday even though plenty of hard things happened. Mom and dad brough Gable to me so I didn't have to go up. Gable wanted me to stay home which does make me feel loved. Lots of people listened to the frustration and allowed me to express my feelings. Now it's time to be done with them and move on with a positive day.

*Couldn't face dinner last night and I was SO GRATEFUL for Wendy's drive through. Sounds dumb but I really couldn't do it. It was so nice to take something off my plate

WINS:
Didn't get mad at mardi  -totally could have for SO MANY THINGS. She knew she was making things hard, but I kept it together.

Decided that somethings at the gym just are not going to get done this weekend. DJ is going to be helping me at peach days. Went and got my dad's generator. We will not be doing a full cleaning. We will do garbages and bathrooms and that will have to do this week.

There are people who DO SEE all that I'm doing. Its nice to be validated on how hard things are. I need to remember that and not compare but to empathize and validate others when they come to me too.